Why start this ?
I have noticed a decline in my short term memory. Not sure if it’s a sign of anything to worry about. As I am hitting my next milestone entering 50 , I figure it’ll be nice to be able to reflect back with the help of this journal, come what may.
Over the last, hmm…. maybe 4 or 5 years , I’ve been muddling through “What is the meaning in life?” phase. I call it a phase because I have seen quite a few going through similar struggle when they were/are in mid 40s to mid 50s.
For me, it all started with a sense of helplessness with my own health followed by lack of fulfillment of where my career was heading. I felt no joy, no meaning with what I was doing.
I started hatching ideas of starting all sorts of businesses but they remain as ideas until today. Signed up to be a volunteer to the local community but have yet to take the next step to actually do the work. My excuse was I have yet to find a cause I feel passionate about.
Transitioning into 50
In May 2013, I joined Fitness First and started weekly hike with my soulmate and darling ang (hubby for hokkien dialect). Thanks to DA (darling ang), Fitbit and Myfitnesspal, I shed enough weight to regain my self confidence back. Am now within a healthy BMI range.
In my quest to “Been there, done it before I hit 50” , my poor family was dragged into “work hard” holidays over the last few years. We have scaled Mount Kinabalu and Asahidake,
scuba dived at Redang twice and Okinawa once
and skied at Nozawa Onsen, Nagano and Nanshan Ski Resort in Beijing.
I’ll stop there as far as adventure holidays are concerned. No paragliding nor bungee jumping please. Extreme sports not my cuppa. Perfectly happy to stick to hiking but DA is getting fond of skiing while my darling char bo kia (CBK is daughter for hokkien dialect) wants to get her PADI Rescue Diver certification next!
Am also very blessed to be able to stay connected with my Kuda girlfriends all these years. Friends whom I have known since kindy and secondary school. Our annual rendezvous since 2010 have been highly therapeutic. It’s our bonding ritual we intend to continue for as long as we can. Over the years, we have been to, in chronological order, Hanoi / HalongBay / Sapa, Chiang Mai, Bandung, Osaka / Kyoto / Kanazawa / KisoValley, Taipei / Hualien, and Busan. So far 3 of us have been able to join each year but not everyone else. The smallest was group was 6 (Japan) and biggest 10 pax (Bandung and Taiwan).
Come June 2017, we’ll be celebrating our Big 5 milestone with the biggest Kuda rendezvous group ever of 11 pax in Macau / HK. It’s now down to me to finalize the itinerary soon !
Getting ready for my 50th
As my own 50th is approaching, I need to expand my energy beyond thoughts and be proactive dealing with this annoying feeling of restlessness. I think what’s bugging me is the feeling of losing control of what I want to do with my life. While I am blessed with great family and friends, I am missing the sense of fulfillment. I know I can do more helping others and it’s high time to take action !
Have just signed up and this time will definitely contribute as a volunteer mentor to underprivileged youth in Hong Kong. Over the few years, without me realizing it, I have acted as a mentor to a few young adults. Every now and then, they came to me for career advice. I do enjoy the process, listening and guiding them to make their own decisions. Whenever they reach out socially, I feel blessed knowing they appreciate the time we spent together. Hence, I have decided to channel my energy to do something more meaningful, i.e. helping local communities. If I can impact just one kid positively, I will be indirectly helping his/her family and their community.
As for work front, I shall get the 28 weeks proposal approved and implemented. I have been in the company 10 years as firefighter #1. Am increasingly frustrated not achieving anything at a strategic level. The 28 week project will be the one opportunity for me to leave a legacy as I did with the Professional Insurance Qualification Programme which I designed and implemented back in my old job in KL.
While I prioritize the above 2, the following as my “sharpen the saw” to do list :
- Regularly read and reflect on a book
- Focus on strength training
- Consistent quality time with parents